Depression - episode 2

Gosh, i never knew just how quickly time would fly and here i am again, blogging out my frustrations and worries. Not much happened in the day but once the afternoon came, I’ve become plagued by issues left unsaid between me, mum & dad. Issues about work, my weight and a ton of other stuff. I've already set out a diet plan for me beginning 1st march and ending on the 31st. but it doesn't cover my inability to get up and find a job. So I’m gonna go out and try to find it.

I'm thinking about skipping a semester from school and focus on work. Or i could get something part time that could work around my timetable and at the same time. Yvette is coming around tomorrow and I’m hoping to unload some of my shit to her and try to get her opinion. Amongst other things, I’m gonna write a letter to uncle kesoni and aunty curu asking if i could be removed from the soldier's roll for personal reasons. My conviction to wear the uniform has gone wrong and i can't make a fool of myself in church before God. I might wear the uniform again in the future but it must be because I’m doing it for God and not for someone else. I know that mum and dad are gonna take it hard but they need to know that I’m trying to do right.

If i do get a job then I’m taking the electricity bill away from them. I'll have to contribute to the fuel cost and also to the food bills. If i play my cards right, i might keep at least $100 for myself and for my up keeping e.g. mobile credit, hair product, stationery, and other miscellaneous stuff. Of course, I would need to open a bank account (Westpac maybe) and have my pay check sent there.

You would have noticed that I’m not whining as much as i was in the last episode .

I'm gonna talk things through with Yvette and maybe even Wati then I’ll act on it, before school starts, i need to have this sorted as soon as possible.

Fingers crossed.

^j^